The essential car wash.

[Tony Griffiths]

The photographer makes a small improvement.

[Steve kay]

"Snapper" Griffiths has such an amazing theatrical archive. Maybe in due course he can share his memories of Bayreuth, and that savage personregie production of Walkure in 1968 which he obviously attended. Wotan wearing an apron, the Walkyries polishing their chariot before carrying off the bodies of dead heroes to Valhalla piled on the back seat. And the magnificent Brechtian relationship with the audience, as Siegrune and Waltraute empty buckets water over the audience in the stalls. Careful examination reveals the runes carved onto the shaft of the spear, here represened by a mop. Oops is that the time? Better get out with the dogs.

[Tony Griffiths]

Not a problem. Here is what it looked like the last time I attended the show:

[Steve kay]

A magnificent appearance by Neptune, but you fail to tell us in which opera. Mozart’s Idomeneo, perhaps? Or perhaps Rameau’s tale of lust and divine vengeance, in which Neptune, pursuing the nymph Nais, ends up destroying his rivals for her hand with tsunami waves? Though perhaps a Paris performance would feature a Bebe Peugeot or a Bedelia. Unless it was a splendid tableau mounted in Rothesay Pavilion, to accompany a performance of Hamish McCunn’s “Land of the Mountains and the Flood” Does our distinguished Scottish Arts Correspondent have anything to say?

[Tony Griffiths]

It was almost certainly "Rameau’s tale of lust and divine vengeance, in which Neptune, pursuing the nymph Nais, ends up destroying his rivals for her hand with tsunami waves." The opera was updated in 1929 by an employee of the Ford Motor Company who dabbled in operatic fantasies. His rare promotional poster was recently discovered and is shown below.

[Steve kay]

Not sure about that. To me it looks more like one of those rather vulgar large engine machines accepted by the VSCC. All the trialling Sevens have faultlessly cleared the hill, this Dagenham dustbin is stuck in the water splash at the foot of the section. Did they pay attention at the drivers briefing, did they hear the possibility of the tide coming in?

[Dave Wortley]

Oh no! This makes my head hurt. I will be having nightmares tonight.

[Colin Cooke]

When I first looked at the Neptune picture, I thought he was taking a selfie, with the phone in his left hand.

[David Stepney]

"Snapper" Griffiths has such an amazing theatrical archive. Maybe in due course he can share his memories of Bayreuth, and that savage personregie production of Walkure in 1968 which he obviously attended. Wotan wearing an apron, the Walkyries polishing their chariot before carrying off the bodies of dead heroes to Valhalla piled on the back seat. And the magnificent Brechtian relationship with the audience, as Siegrune and Waltraute empty buckets water over the audience in the stalls. Careful examination reveals the runes carved onto the shaft of the spear, here represened by a mop. Oops is that the time? Better get out with the dogs.

"Around the Ragnarok the rugged Austin ran."

I too will get my coat......

[Tony Griffiths]

Not sure about that. To me it looks more like one of those rather vulgar large engine machines accepted by the VSCC. All the trialling Sevens have faultlessly cleared the hill, this Dagenham dustbin is stuck in the water splash at the foot of the section. Did they pay attention at the drivers briefing, did they hear the possibility of the tide coming in?

When I first looked at the Neptune picture, I thought he was taking a selfie, with the phone in his left hand.

"Ford, Ford, four wheels and a board", muttered my wife as, decades ago, my 250,000-mile Cortina estate spluttered to a halt.